When I first mentioned the idea of cycling on our world trip, my girlfriend thought it was utterly nuts. But guess what. Last month we both quit our jobs, and ditched our desks for two shiny new bicycles. World here we come.

Let me start off with saying you should never try to change a person. If your partner isn’t an outdoorsy kind of person. Don’t drag them into something they don’t want. It will save you and your partner a lot of drama. Find a middle way, or decide which is more important to you. If you are so lucky that your lover shares your thirst for travel adventures, read on. I’ll show you the ropes.

Look, this is our new home!

Never ever do this

Rule number one? Never ever ever nag or whine that you want it so bad. Nagging is annoying, and your partner will be less likely to embrace the idea as its own. Which is what we are going for.

Because let’s think about it. If you’re standing in the middle of no man’s land, you’ve ran out of food. The hail storm broke your tent, so now it’s leaking and you’re ice cold. THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! Your partner will be mad at you, not at the conditions.

And at this point, you’re also tired, hangry and cold. Do you really want to put your relationship through that test? I certainly don’t. Conditions are going to be shitty at certain points. In return however, you will get the best trip of your life.

Brainwash

Well, that sounds a bit harsh. But people are generally more likely to be excited, for something they (think) they came up with themselves. So instead of convincing, it’s more a game of influencing. Let me say it again, only if it suits a person. Influence, not change.

This will take time, so be patient. In the meantime you can do your own research. There’s plenty of stuff to figure out. Don’t be sneaky about it, just don’t share it all the time. Explore routes, do research on bicycles. Find the right equipment for you and follow some of your favorite biketourers on Instagram (like ours!). We also enjoyed following other couples.

At first I followed the couples myself. But when something stood out – not particularly related to bike touring, but of which I knew Sabina would like it – I would show it to her. Not even mentioning that these people are having so much fun because of what they were doing. Saying, oh look how much fun bike touring is, will not help you. They’ll see it themselves, just be patient.

So how do I influence?

We both already knew we wanted to travel. For a long streak this time, both quitting our jobs. Quite the commitment, if you ask me. So the stakes were high.

For us it all started with talking about where we wanted to travel. This is something that you can easily daydream about together. Ask your partner where he or she would like to travel. And off course also share where you want to go. Not necessarily biking. You just want to go there. Don’t say that you only want to go there if you can do it on a bike.

It will not only pressure your partner, which will backfire. It also limits yourself. What if your partner can’t get enthusiastic for the whole idea, but is for the country. Will you not budge, and rent a kickass 4×4 instead?

Build the bucket list

What countries are on both your lists? Build this up to a rough route together with your partner. You’ll have fun doing this. Watch travel documentaries, find blogs and see if you can score a Lonely planet of the country. Key? Do it together!

Once you have your route, you can start doing research. Lots of biketourers and other travellers have made amazing content, which really helped me convince Sabina.

(The story continues after the video’s)

These are some of our favourites:

The Way of Manaslu

Sabina loves hiking, so Nepal stands very high on our travel wishlist. Eaglewood Films made this amazing film about their way around the World’s 8th tallest mountain, the Manaslu.

TWOBIKETO: India

Probably our favourite cycling couple we have followed. Matt and Rebecca have really inspired us. We really like their Instagram too.

The trail to Kazbegi

Georgia is where it will all begin! We’re not going to Kazbegi like Joey Schusler. But we will ride to Omalo, where their epic trip began.

Wild Horses

The sceneries in the Silk Road Mountain Race are to die for. We can see ourselves cycling here, just at a slightly slower pace! 😉

Take time

If you notice that your beloved is starting to lean towards biketouring, still don’t push it. Your beloved is probably just curious why you’re so interested in biketouring. He or she might start to have questions about it. And remember all that researching you started months ago? Guess who’s the comforting, well informed and safe to travel with-partner now!

Appreciate their interest in something that you’re passionate about. Also show interest in your partners passion. You’re in a loving relationship, show it.

Don’t overkill it

Be careful not to shower your beloved with a storm of information once they start to ask more serious questions. Let him or her figure some stuff out on their own as well. This might mean you need to take a step back, did I already mention you need a lot of patience?

Be careful that all the info you’ve gathered doesn’t make you a know-it-all. This might make your partner feel unequipped, to take on such a big venture. Doing own research builds self trust. Besides, it’s also fun to get new outtakes on your trip, from the one you want to make it with in the first place.

Money makes them wheels go round

Once you start planning your trip, you and your partners promptly see how expensive traveling is. Well, not so much on a bike. You have your transportation under your bum, and your accommodation in your pannier. That saves you some serious bucks. This can also be a good thing to pitch in when you start talking money. Not as an argument, just as a passing thought. Subtle right.

Have some fun

Don’t hang yourself up on the whole idea of biketouring. Don’t make it a make or break it (unless it is). If the idea doesn’t latches on, maybe now isn’t the right time. Or you can go on a shorter trip by yourself or even together.

Don’t let it get in the way of how you feel for each other. Find a good compromise, have a different adventure instead. That route that you planned? You can still go there. No need to feel sorry for yourself, just go outside and do it. In whatever way suits you and your partner.

Disclaimer: I dreamt of bike touring my whole life. But I didn’t actively scheme to convince my girlfriend. We wrote this blog together, after thinking how Sabina went from cycling noob to full time bike tourer. We are both very thankful we can share this journey together.